You Can Attack Or You Can Help: Part 2

My most ambitious clients bemoan the underperformers on their team.
Contrary to the hypothesis that underperformers are out to ruin your life,
It turns out everyone is doing the best they can for now.
YOU CAN ATTACK OR YOU CAN HELP.

How do you help an underperformer pick it up or decide this isn't for them?

STRATEGY #1 is to ATTACK them: because the underperformer threatens our agenda, we get aggressive, sarcastic, critical and hope they'll pick up what we're putting down!

But this often will cause the underperformer to complain about your aggression to HR, and it doesn't lead to any change in their underperformance.

STRATEGY #2 is to HELP.
Accept the person isn't showing up to ruin your life. The underperformer has a lot going on in their own world that is preventing them from showing up in the way you'd like them to.

Your ATTACK strategy hypothesizes that "this idiot doesn't care."
Your HELP mindset lets you get curious about what might be going on for them.

Once you get past your anger of an underperformer threatening your mission, you can catch your breath and try HELPING, which looks like saying to the underperformer:
1. I want you to succeed here.

2. I notice you are missing deadlines, not coming to the office, and making a lot of careless errors. I was wondering if you were aware you were doing these things? [If they try to debate, say 'While I hear your perspective, I am telling you that you're not performing at the level we want and I'm here to help you think about what it will take to bridge the gap.]

3. How can I HELP you get from where you are to where we need you to be? What's preventing you from performing more consistently? How could we get you more engaged?

When you HELP from a place of curiosity, there is the possibility of co-creating a solution together.

When you ATTACK due to your frustration, the underperformer feels it, and will likely dig in further / shut down and grow ever more distant.

As a manager, you have a duty to help your underlings either perform or get clarity on why they don't want to be in the job.

Frustration drains you and has little probability of improving the situation. Helping with curiosity takes the load off you and helps the underperformer map a way to performing, or deciding to leave, so someone else with ambition and buy-in can take their spot.

[Inspired by Laura Crawshaw, Ph.D., BCC Taming The Abrasive Manager]

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