How an Empathetic Leader can manage an Unaccountable Employee

If you're an empathetic leader,
Managing people is hard.
You want them to succeed, but there are two parts to the equation for your juniors to succeed.

On one hand, it's on you to give feedback, guide and mold your team,
On the other hand, their part is to show up and "take ownership" and grow.
It takes two to tango.

My empathetic clients who run investment funds genuinely care about helping their employees be their best.
You need productive people in seats who are bought into your cause to process deals and business wins, and LPs/clients don't like to see a lot of turnover.

But a common trap occurs for this type of leader: caring too much.
On a spectrum of not caring at all (tone deaf) to caring too much, the right edge of this spectrum involves the Group Head feeling like they have to "carry the rock" for the juniors... the Leader might think "if I can't coach the junior to success, then the Group Head is a failure."

While this is a noble thought / aspiration, it's a mistake.
Some employees will "own their career" and continuously evolve,
Others might not care, or just don't get it.

You have to be comfortable with the idea some employees cannot be saved. Once you accept this, you can be more effective knowing:
1. You are giving feedforward about a) what the employee is doing well, b) what skills you'd like to see them develop going forward, and c) what you'd like them to stop doing.
2. They are hearing your guidance. Every adult makes their own decisions, and they may elect to learn and improve, or not. This "election" is none of your business as their manager -- it's up to the employee to make this decision and own their own destiny.

Are you being drained by a few members of your team who push back, play the victim, and don't accept accountability for their own success?

Employees with raw talent and potential ("good athletes") are not effective members of a team without skills like listening, understanding where the team is trying to go, being a good team player.

In order to create the best experience, culture, and be fully present for the members of your team who care, it may be time to draw a clear boundary, and release those who refuse to be accountable over multiple review periods.